We’ve all heard that saying, when you fall off, you have to get right back up on that horse. I’ve had horses. I’ve fallen off. I’ve had to get back up on and it is not easy. I think the phrase stays in our lexicon because if we think of life as the horse, we all fall off from time to time and getting back with what we want to do is difficult. I know I’m talking a lot lately about this kind of topic but it is all around me.
For me, this week the horse has been my long arm. I haven’t quilted anything in MONTHS. It could be almost a year but I’m afraid to look closely at the calendar. I was afraid it wouldn’t even turn on, let alone sew the way I need. I joined a FB group for owners of my particular software, hoping that I would get some inspiration and some direction from there too, but at the end of the day, it comes down to me putting a quilt on the machine and starting.
I made so many mistakes. Rookie mistakes. Measured my back the wrong way and made it too wide to fit the machine. Once I corrected the width, I didn’t have enough fabric for the length. Thank heavens for a giant stash, go in there, find another piece and insert it into the back. Ok back done. Load it on the machine. Oh look I forgot to cut off the selvedges. Ok I can do that as I load the back, just stop at each seam and cut them off. Each step of the way, I’m nervous and I’m worried but I keep going. I know that if I don’t do this quilt, I’m going to atrophy into someone who is so afraid of the machine that I won’t ever sew again. So I push forward.
Since it has been so long since I’ve used the machine I give it a thorough cleaning and oiling and change the needle. Thanks to the user group there was a great video and I did just what it said to do. Got things cleaned up and got my quilt loaded and with HUGE amounts of trepidation, started to sew my first pass. It went better than I could have imagined. Everything worked. So I turned everything off and walked away. This morning I got up early and sewed two more passes. Again, things worked like they are supposed to. I still have two more passes before the quilt is done (it’s 98×98) but I’m getting back into the swing of things. But I’m on that horse again.
I am writing this post so that I can look back later on and remind myself that I can get back up on that horse. When life throws me a curve and I get away from doing the things I want, I can get back to it. I cannot let the fear of failure keep me from doing the things I love. I cannot let that fear overwhelm me to the point of atrophy. It may be slow and there will be mistakes, but each time, I just need to dust myself off, have a good talk with myself and get right back up on that horse.